We like to believe that with all the planning and time invested in a wedding, like sourcing wedding venues and wedding service providers, the day should be the crowning moment of a match made in heaven.
When the final disaster-avoidance check list for the day is reviewed …
The best that the wedding budget can buy has been secured for the day. √Check
The wedding table settings have been hammered out allowing for awkward guests and family feuds. √Check
The more potentially ‘boisterous’ wedding guests have been assigned an ‘alcohol limit monitor’. √Check
The minister has been prepped for the wedding and knows your names and how to pronounce them correctly. √Check
All the wedding dresses, outfits, rings, bouquets, groom and other wedding essentials are in the country and accounted for. √Check
The best man has been given strict instructions to keep his speech family friendly and to pretend he has suffered memory loss for certain selected embarrassing moments. √Check
No exotic food will be served the night before to any of the wedding VIP’s. √Check
It’s is a comfort to know that despite the best plans going wrong and the worst wedding disasters, that all the wedding couples have mostly managed to survive and tie the knot. Some of the most memorable and celebrated weddings are those that survived some sort of wedding catastrophe.
Here are a few wedding disasters that stick out from weddings I have attended.
Be careful that thing might go off!
While at the bridal party’s table the dashing groom was in mid (nervous) speech and unconsciously fiddling with a magnum of pink champagne, that was to be opened as a special treat for a ‘special ‘guest (special as in special pronounced with a rictus smile and rolling eyes)– his new Mother in Law.
As he rambled on, the bottle fiddling became more feverish, and as a result the cork fired out, luckily missing the old dear, but the geyser of foamy pink spray was dead on target.
Nice weather for ducks!
A French pique-nique was the theme for this wedding. Luckily there was a backup plan to have the guests in a marquee tent. As the guests gathered for the reception the heavens opened. The torrential downpour that ensued was is if there was a lake above the clouds that was draining freely through an enormous colander. The grass disappeared under a river of ankle deep water that rushed under the tent. The guests decided to stay seated undercover in the tent, with their feet hovering inches above the water, rather than attempt a mad dash and get instantly drenched. So as the lightning flashed, the thunder boomed and the water gushed, the champagne was consumed in great gulps. Because the food was undercover beyond no man’s (wet) land, the guests quickly became very jolly.
Wind swept and bone dry!
This wedding was set to be a lovely affair on the beach with a beautifully decorated floral pergola. The sea was like a lake as the pergola and chairs were set up on the beach. But as the helpers neared the completion of their tasks the wind was already gently rippling on the surface of the ocean. By the time the wedding was ready to get underway the wind had increased significantly. The guests were sandblasted as they sat through the wedding ceremony, and not a spoken word was heard as the wind snatched the vows away. The guests retreated to the reception venue to dust the sand off and quench their dry throats, only to discover that there were not enough beverages to do the job. The groom’s father had decided, in his wisdom, that the wedding would only need a few bottles of champagne for the toasts and a couple boxes of wine.
Being adamant that he had done his part and besides it was Sunday so no more drinks could be purchased, he shrugged off the incredulous looks of the parched guests. A few of the more enterprising guests came to the rescue, passed a hat around and dashed off to the local shebeen.
Despite what happened during the weddings above all the marriages are still going strong. No wedding guests were harmed on the day and when weddings are discussed they are always remembered fondly.
Of course you can avoid the stress of wind swept beaches and leave it all in the capable hands of the Intundla Wedding Coordinators.
